Life lessons from the cross country team

 Today I did a test run in my endless passion for teaching with another unique situation : I am becoming a driving instructor.  With a private company in my city, I am going to be riding in cars with high school kids as they are in their quest to obtain their first driver's license.  A rite of passage for all of us.  Today, with the owner of the company in tow to observe both me and the driver, we pulled into a high school and picked up a junior.  He was there to do his summer practice for his participation in cross country running.  He also said he participates in swimming as well as track, but due to the Corona Virus he was not able to do his swimming as planned.  I was very lucky, he was really a great driver and didn't seem nervous or unsure of things as he said he had driven quite a bit in the past.  I was pleased to see that this was the case over time as we coasted over country roads with waves as dips.  We also passed the westside main campus branch of a local community college, which I didn't know used to be a military base many years ago and had been converted to accomodate the community college.  I learned that from the older gentleman who I had been riding with the last week with some of the students, he was quite knowledgeable.  

While on our trip today, I did all the standard teaching things one must do when they are instructing (positive reinforcement, praise, advising of driving conditions such as be careful of the soft shoulder or rain drain ditches, etc.).  Sometimes we would talk about other things, as I made sure to ask the student questions about him.  He was a cross country runner.  Being that I have always been a poor runner, I was curious as to what kind of drills or approaches one participates in for cross country running.  He explained to me that they do much of the same drills that most running oriented sports entail such as wind sprints, mountain climbers, distance running, etc.  He also told me something that I refrained from making further comment on : he and his teammates (or friends) would all get together and do things together outside of school and the confines of being on the sports team.  When I'd asked him how much of the city he'd driven around, he said he'd been on the south as well as the westside, but very little in the city.  He had been out to the extreme east of our city, but not in the suburbs.  Eastern suburbs in my city are filled with many twists and turns, as it was/is the oldest portion of the city and much was built over, while the westside, being newer, was much more pleasant for driving because most of the major roads are parallel lines only running north/south and west/east.  He said he'd been to the east side, out to Geneva-on-the-Lake.  I knew immediately why he and his friends had chosen that place to go to, as they have a very nice boardwalk and beach for a day trip.  I myself had been there once years ago but hadn't been out that way in many years.  He and his friends were rather disappointed in the conditions of the virus this year, because they would go off and do fun things together.  They bought a map of Ohio, as well as some darts and a dart board from Wal-Mart, then would throw the darts at the map.  They'd take a pole as to which place sounded the most exotic, do some research and then decide on a location and adventure based on what their research. 

He also said that due to the virus, he and his cross country friends were unable to enjoy a lot of the things they usually did during the summers.  I asked what they were, he said they would go camping in state parks, go to county fairs, and have a BBQ or two.  That sounded great.  It also made me depressed (I'll get to that later on as to how and why).  He also said that they were unable to practice a popular tradition, which was to have a time capsule party.  I asked what that was.  He said they would receive letters from past cross country runners who had graduated the year before.  These letters would provide life lessons for the younger cross country team members that they learned.  This made me laugh, but I kept it all inside.

As one is spending so much time around kids K-12, one seems to revert back to their own educational years K-12, as any educator can tell you.  And, as usual when I was in this mode, I went back down memory lane to my own high school years.  And I was depressed, as usual.  What was wrong with others in my class?  Granted, my class was particularly evil and sarcastic, but we just didn't ... Mesh I suppose.  When I tried with others they just said "None of your business" and that was pretty much it.  I kept my distance.  It makes me sad when I hear others such as this guy tell me about all the fun and special experiences he was having, building comradery and hopefully long lasting relationships with others.  Why him and not me or others?  You might as well ask me what the meaning of life is, because I don't know that either.  I have a pretty good idea what it is by now, but not the complete answer.  And if I knew the complete answer, I would tell you, readers.

The part that made me laugh was when he said that part about the time capsule.  Life lessons learned one YEAR after leaving high school?!?  Maybe if you went to jail or something.  Of course, I didn't laugh at him, he was going to find out and see all those millions of seductions we all get into as part of growing up.  You think you're the only one but kids all discover the same things over and over again, some of them come along a bit later than others.  I'd like to see them all get together and read those letters 25-30 years after high school and they'd all laugh at themselves.  But, if that's to happen, they'll find out, just like we all do.  

It also made me sad again to hear that he had built up these relationships that indicated that they would last, because none of mine did.  The day after high school was over, I never heard a word from any of them ever again.  Before Facebook, I would bump into one or two of them here and there in a public place, but other than that, never.  After Facebook?  I friended some of them, eventually they unfriended me or never accepted the request to begin with.  I'll talk to a few once or twice a year, and that's a lot considering cancel culture.  And, .... what do we have to talk about?  Mostly how sad and lonely we felt in high school and how life is better now.  Is that what we have left?  This is the legacy?  Apparently.  But, it left me feeling happy as well.  Little did I know, like my charge today, that the best was yet to come.  Did I know that when I was a sad, lonely, high school kid that I would have such an exotic and exciting life?  The highest highs, the lowest lows.  Traveling to distant lands, rock music, passionate love affairs, and living the dreams that filter down the pike.  And meeting wonderful, quirky, freaky people all the time who have enriched my life for better or for worse.  Doing a hero's journey is never easy, and I lived.  Oh have I ever lived, and I wouldn't trade that for anything. 

I dropped off my charge and said I hoped we would see each other again someday.  Just beginning his journey in life, so happy.