The beginning of the end at last
After six years, I have at last come to the end of my time at Cleveland State University (or CSU as it's known), and I will have that degree coming in the mail soon. It's been a long road, no question, full of many twists and turns. I changed my mind a few times about the direction I wanted to go in, I questioned the universe, I had many doubts and insecurities, and I even considered quitting at some point or another. But no, like everything else, we push on. It's been a rough road, and yet it was one of the most rewarding things I have ever done.
I had many doubts when I started down this path in 2008. I was 34 years old, I was too old to go back to university life as a full time student, I thought. But no, I realized that I was given a message. The old career had bottomed out completely as it was populated by losers who didn't bother to learn their jobs and business and industry (what there is left of it now) had become a hostage crisis. Did I want to spend my whole life on disability or in the middle of this misery once again? The answer was no, and I had to make some major changes. Quite honestly, I realized it was all about writing my own ticket rather than slugging it out in the trenches of a loosing war which I had been doing before. I learned a lot to say the least. Political correctness is a major bitch, kids and adults alike are psychotic due to their hormones and substance abuse problems, the hypocrisy of our educational system, and people don't communicate very well with each other. Honestly though, despite all it's pitfalls and slippage, the last few years were some of the best I'd had. I am truly happy when I am in an academic setting, I had not thrived like this since the first time around ended. It turned out to be a more positive thing than I thought it would be, as I am older, savvier and more mature than I was the first time around and I did the right things this time. Many started and either failed or quit because they were bored or unable to swim with the rest of the fishes, but like everything else, I stood and fought rather than lie down and die. And even when CSU stabbed me in the back because that's what's part of the process does to all in the fold, I didn't let those stabs hurt me any more than they did. Corporate America decided to give me a few more stabs and scars as well, but I had to say "fuck you" and face poverty without shame. And, that's what I did because I had no choice. I felt like the last man standing when I returned this last semester because despite the promise of making capital at another job, this was lingering over me still that I had to finish writing the ticket. And I did it.
So thank you, CSU, you did good. I made a lot of wonderful new friends and acquaintance there, and I am a richer person because of you. And I decided that education, after all, IS where I am going to be. Here's to hoping for the future, you gave me a lot. And I'm looking to the future with hope that there will be good things. Sing it loud, sing it proud.
I had many doubts when I started down this path in 2008. I was 34 years old, I was too old to go back to university life as a full time student, I thought. But no, I realized that I was given a message. The old career had bottomed out completely as it was populated by losers who didn't bother to learn their jobs and business and industry (what there is left of it now) had become a hostage crisis. Did I want to spend my whole life on disability or in the middle of this misery once again? The answer was no, and I had to make some major changes. Quite honestly, I realized it was all about writing my own ticket rather than slugging it out in the trenches of a loosing war which I had been doing before. I learned a lot to say the least. Political correctness is a major bitch, kids and adults alike are psychotic due to their hormones and substance abuse problems, the hypocrisy of our educational system, and people don't communicate very well with each other. Honestly though, despite all it's pitfalls and slippage, the last few years were some of the best I'd had. I am truly happy when I am in an academic setting, I had not thrived like this since the first time around ended. It turned out to be a more positive thing than I thought it would be, as I am older, savvier and more mature than I was the first time around and I did the right things this time. Many started and either failed or quit because they were bored or unable to swim with the rest of the fishes, but like everything else, I stood and fought rather than lie down and die. And even when CSU stabbed me in the back because that's what's part of the process does to all in the fold, I didn't let those stabs hurt me any more than they did. Corporate America decided to give me a few more stabs and scars as well, but I had to say "fuck you" and face poverty without shame. And, that's what I did because I had no choice. I felt like the last man standing when I returned this last semester because despite the promise of making capital at another job, this was lingering over me still that I had to finish writing the ticket. And I did it.
So thank you, CSU, you did good. I made a lot of wonderful new friends and acquaintance there, and I am a richer person because of you. And I decided that education, after all, IS where I am going to be. Here's to hoping for the future, you gave me a lot. And I'm looking to the future with hope that there will be good things. Sing it loud, sing it proud.
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