Love
As Valentine's Day approaches, there are a million things that people will do and say about love because that's what we do on Valentine's Day. We will either spend a bundle on candy and flowers (for ourselves or someone else), or do the whole "I hate Valentine's Day" routine. We will show what rebels we are by not buying said candy and flowers and whining about it, aren't we punk rock? Ha ha ha ... What can I possibly say about it that has not already been written before or since, by me or another party on this most sordid of sordid topics? I wish I could, even after rereading my past materials on this site and others'. Perhaps I will reflect upon this sordid topic in a new way ...
Love gets harder as you get older, the reasons are many. When we are between age 18-24, no matter what your life experience, it seems that people think that we are supposed to immediately move onto the next phase in life. This can include many things, from moving into the adult world from an academic one, from having to make many choices in life when they were made by or for you before, moving out of the home you grew up in to another, etc. Here is where many make mistakes. Many translate this unsureness to marrying. Some marry their high school sweethearts having never been with anyone else and it naturally does not work out. Some will also end up with their immediate post high school sweetheart, which is virtually the same thing. It's really not the best idea that one end up with either one of these parties, you both are not mature enough. When one is in this frame of mind, one is not interested in career growth or settling down with someone, but rather staying out until dawn with all those millions of little seductions. Part of those millions of seductions is to acquire as many partners as possible, of which we all do (without whose details of getting too graphic, naming names or giving numbers because I have my street cred to think about), and we bounce from one to another to another. Then we dedicate ourselves to various forms of alcohol abuse and substances because we want to do nothing else but, part of which causes the partner bouncing. Then we have a moment of clarity and say quality is better than quantity, and we look for something better. And along this journey in life, we get hurt a lot, we get burned, and then we have to reevaluated, over and over.
What causes it not to work out? Many a thing. Some say that it has to do with social classes or education levels not being in sync with one another. Not always, it's easy to love a rich as well as a poor person equally. Is it just on the part of one gender? Not always, but I wish that some would come up with better excuses than the ones they give. "I love you, I'm just not in love with you" is one for the most creative of spirits, just so you know. I have heard many a man tell me that it's always women who end it, but I have yet to meet one of these (and vice versa). I for one always tried to work things out with the other party, be as easy to get on with as possible, and just be the coolest gal that they would ever want to have around. I guess that's not good enough for most. Some accuse others of not being supportive or having much to fight about, but I fail to see where that is either. People love drama, and despite what Hollywood likes to cover in their standard issue romantic comedies, it's actually a long term relationship that has a lot of drama within it. Think one thing, do the other. Be verbal and standard, that way you are always right, never sway from your course of action, and you will be always right. Bend to a demand, they hate you; defy them, they tell you that you're crazy.
I often times find myself in the same position over and over. Despite all the excuses and all the tired old sayings that they give, I have yet to hear one that is truly original and one that has validity. I have often times wondered why this is the case despite whatever reason they give as to why it cannot be. And yet, barely a year, in some cases a few weeks, later, they grab onto the next woman who comes along, usually a bottom feeder because a bottom feeder is the next one who comes along. Some are even brazen enough to marry or move in with them. Of this, I have come to the conclusion that most guys would ultimately rather have trash than a good woman. Sure, trashy girls are lots of fun just like Alpha Males are, but who will bring home the bacon when the bacon needs to be brought home? In that situation, no one seems to want the job. And, the super big question is, of course, why does it not happen? Is it mental illness? Is it a sense of rebound? Is it not being ready to do something else? Is it a clash of egos? Perhaps all of those things, it's a delicate balance. The other party simply does not deserve a good woman, they would rather have trash who throw temper tantrums and cause problems. Then they get tired and move on, get left or taken advantage of by the trash, or they learn their lessons and regret. And they wonder why I can be so cold and unfeeling. Regret is unprofessional, James Bond (one of the Daniel Craig movies) taught me that, can't show them that I'm weak.
People try to help at times, because that's all they can do or they want their fellow man to be happy. Voice these concerns to them and they will say it too can happen to you someday. That's hard to swallow anymore. I'm the Alpha Female, a swashbuckling loner. I'm kind of a difficult act to follow for most, so they of course will settle for second best or a standard issue trash woman. Some even try to put two people together and sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn't. You're a silver pinball just bouncing off bumpers and flippers, accumulating empty points.
People confuse a lot of things in life, love is one of them. Romance and carnal lust are in their own realms, but they fall under the umbrella of love like it or not. Romance resides somewhere between platonic love and carnal lust, and it's something that we're not always clear on. Often times we confuse love, carnal lust and romance with capital and spending. You're supposed to show others that you care by buying the other person something. And it has to be something specific as well, because the type of something is a direct reflection of what you feel for that person. Even though we think we are so unique, we are actually slaves to advertising, capitalism and mass media marketing campaigns. (Just watch one of those ads for EHarmony sometime.) Contrary to what commercials are telling you, love actually doesn't cost a thing. It's just being with another person, thoughtfulness, and, in general, happiness in being with someone else. That's all it is.
Sometimes the hardest thing about love is that it really is so simple when others think it's something that it isn't. It's not about capital, it's not about expectations or demands, it's not about any of those things that we have been blinded by. It's not about being the center of attention, it's not about making a display, it's not about any of those things. It haunts at night, sometimes during the day. It's all just a bunch of memories we all carry, and those from the past probably pretend that they remember otherwise, or maybe don't remember you at all. What would we say if we could or would see them again? Not much I don't think ... You don't know what to say sometimes, but all we want is just one thing and one thing alone, despite what everything else seems to point to as explanation or excuse ...
Just say that you love me.
Instead, as I face the next Valentine's Day ... A cold stone has entered my heart. I have lost all feelings, not just for this holiday, but all of humanity anymore. Just another damaged being, some would say. Maybe so, but I am the Man of Steel. Harsh, cold and unstoppable, pushing on. All I want is for someone to say that they love me, deep within.
Love gets harder as you get older, the reasons are many. When we are between age 18-24, no matter what your life experience, it seems that people think that we are supposed to immediately move onto the next phase in life. This can include many things, from moving into the adult world from an academic one, from having to make many choices in life when they were made by or for you before, moving out of the home you grew up in to another, etc. Here is where many make mistakes. Many translate this unsureness to marrying. Some marry their high school sweethearts having never been with anyone else and it naturally does not work out. Some will also end up with their immediate post high school sweetheart, which is virtually the same thing. It's really not the best idea that one end up with either one of these parties, you both are not mature enough. When one is in this frame of mind, one is not interested in career growth or settling down with someone, but rather staying out until dawn with all those millions of little seductions. Part of those millions of seductions is to acquire as many partners as possible, of which we all do (without whose details of getting too graphic, naming names or giving numbers because I have my street cred to think about), and we bounce from one to another to another. Then we dedicate ourselves to various forms of alcohol abuse and substances because we want to do nothing else but, part of which causes the partner bouncing. Then we have a moment of clarity and say quality is better than quantity, and we look for something better. And along this journey in life, we get hurt a lot, we get burned, and then we have to reevaluated, over and over.
What causes it not to work out? Many a thing. Some say that it has to do with social classes or education levels not being in sync with one another. Not always, it's easy to love a rich as well as a poor person equally. Is it just on the part of one gender? Not always, but I wish that some would come up with better excuses than the ones they give. "I love you, I'm just not in love with you" is one for the most creative of spirits, just so you know. I have heard many a man tell me that it's always women who end it, but I have yet to meet one of these (and vice versa). I for one always tried to work things out with the other party, be as easy to get on with as possible, and just be the coolest gal that they would ever want to have around. I guess that's not good enough for most. Some accuse others of not being supportive or having much to fight about, but I fail to see where that is either. People love drama, and despite what Hollywood likes to cover in their standard issue romantic comedies, it's actually a long term relationship that has a lot of drama within it. Think one thing, do the other. Be verbal and standard, that way you are always right, never sway from your course of action, and you will be always right. Bend to a demand, they hate you; defy them, they tell you that you're crazy.
I often times find myself in the same position over and over. Despite all the excuses and all the tired old sayings that they give, I have yet to hear one that is truly original and one that has validity. I have often times wondered why this is the case despite whatever reason they give as to why it cannot be. And yet, barely a year, in some cases a few weeks, later, they grab onto the next woman who comes along, usually a bottom feeder because a bottom feeder is the next one who comes along. Some are even brazen enough to marry or move in with them. Of this, I have come to the conclusion that most guys would ultimately rather have trash than a good woman. Sure, trashy girls are lots of fun just like Alpha Males are, but who will bring home the bacon when the bacon needs to be brought home? In that situation, no one seems to want the job. And, the super big question is, of course, why does it not happen? Is it mental illness? Is it a sense of rebound? Is it not being ready to do something else? Is it a clash of egos? Perhaps all of those things, it's a delicate balance. The other party simply does not deserve a good woman, they would rather have trash who throw temper tantrums and cause problems. Then they get tired and move on, get left or taken advantage of by the trash, or they learn their lessons and regret. And they wonder why I can be so cold and unfeeling. Regret is unprofessional, James Bond (one of the Daniel Craig movies) taught me that, can't show them that I'm weak.
People try to help at times, because that's all they can do or they want their fellow man to be happy. Voice these concerns to them and they will say it too can happen to you someday. That's hard to swallow anymore. I'm the Alpha Female, a swashbuckling loner. I'm kind of a difficult act to follow for most, so they of course will settle for second best or a standard issue trash woman. Some even try to put two people together and sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn't. You're a silver pinball just bouncing off bumpers and flippers, accumulating empty points.
People confuse a lot of things in life, love is one of them. Romance and carnal lust are in their own realms, but they fall under the umbrella of love like it or not. Romance resides somewhere between platonic love and carnal lust, and it's something that we're not always clear on. Often times we confuse love, carnal lust and romance with capital and spending. You're supposed to show others that you care by buying the other person something. And it has to be something specific as well, because the type of something is a direct reflection of what you feel for that person. Even though we think we are so unique, we are actually slaves to advertising, capitalism and mass media marketing campaigns. (Just watch one of those ads for EHarmony sometime.) Contrary to what commercials are telling you, love actually doesn't cost a thing. It's just being with another person, thoughtfulness, and, in general, happiness in being with someone else. That's all it is.
Sometimes the hardest thing about love is that it really is so simple when others think it's something that it isn't. It's not about capital, it's not about expectations or demands, it's not about any of those things that we have been blinded by. It's not about being the center of attention, it's not about making a display, it's not about any of those things. It haunts at night, sometimes during the day. It's all just a bunch of memories we all carry, and those from the past probably pretend that they remember otherwise, or maybe don't remember you at all. What would we say if we could or would see them again? Not much I don't think ... You don't know what to say sometimes, but all we want is just one thing and one thing alone, despite what everything else seems to point to as explanation or excuse ...
Just say that you love me.
Instead, as I face the next Valentine's Day ... A cold stone has entered my heart. I have lost all feelings, not just for this holiday, but all of humanity anymore. Just another damaged being, some would say. Maybe so, but I am the Man of Steel. Harsh, cold and unstoppable, pushing on. All I want is for someone to say that they love me, deep within.
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