"Have I done something wrong?"
This is yet another blog about crazy people, which is nothing new when talking about me. I have always been a tad on the odd side, I would imagine that most people would conclude this within minutes of meeting me or after a few chats here and there. Despite what some may or may not think, I don't go out of my way to meet crazy people. If anything in recent years, I have decided that there are too many crazy people out there in the world and all they do is create drama where drama is not necessary. Unstable people, however, have always seen something rather magical in me which causes them to become a bit on the obsessed side. Jodie Foster might know what I'm talking about. It's not as necessary to be out every weekend, spending them indoors is not always the worst thing to do. But that's another blog about being an aging hipster.
The other week I got a phone call from a crazy person once again. I'd distanced myself from her because of her never ending drama. About nine or ten years ago she married an Arab Muslim from Pakistan after they had known each other for about six weeks or so. He started to hit her and she left. While going through the process of their divorce, she moved back home here and then put up a profile on Match.com. While she had no money to pay her rent or buy groceries, she did seem to have enough to travel all across America to meet guys she had met online. She'd cried buckets of tears after one told her that after she'd spent a week with him in his hometown somewhere in California that he was not sure how he felt about the situation. Then he told her that it was over because he was in love with some woman he was sitting next to for an hour on an airplane. I couldn't believe that she was actually wasting time over this jackass but she asked me "Why doesn't he love me?". I didn't know what to say about it.
The drama continued when she relocated to pursue another degree, one resulted in her being thrown in jail. She said she was at some party with, once again, some guy, and they got into a fight. He threw a glass of wine in her face, and she stormed out. Just after she had stomped out of the party, the police picked her up and arrested her. For what? Drunk and disorderly, she explained. Were you drunk? No, she wasn't drunk, he had thrown the wine on her and they smelled the alcohol on her so they thought she was drunk. I didn't buy that. I don't care if the man has been a cop for twenty years or twenty minutes, they know drunk when they see it. After that story, I was hoping that she wouldn't bother to contact me again because I wasn't going to bother with this.
Sure enough, a few months ago, the phone rang and it was her. She had called my parents' house and my dad, like the oddly neive man he is despite his seventy years, gave her all my numbers and contact information. Hopefully she will never show up on my doorstep, but she has called several times since that initial contact. Now back in town, she failed to earn the degree she was after for some reason, and then she answered an ad for a roommate on Craig's List. She moved in, once again, with some guy, and was there for a day. Something went down, and she left the apartment, dropped everything and flew back here with nothing, leaving behind her job, connections, friends, etc. The guy who she lived with eventually sent back her clothes and things in boxes and doused them in chemicals, ruining them and all of her things. And now she really REALLY has nothing. She's not stable at all, according to her dad, her paranoia has mounted, and the next stop is the nuthouse if she doesn't get treatment.
I've decided that the best thing to do in this situation is to let things stand and not be part of it anymore. She needs someone to be her friend right now, but I'm not going to be that friend. Her life is going to be a continuous unfolding of toxic relationships and I don't want to be part of it because she is just a train wreck. Just because my life isn't a train wreck, she feels that she hasn't done her part because she hasn't made mine into one. I've turned my back on her. She called the other week, I hung up the phone, no explanation, no apologies, nothing. It's for the best. She wrote me an email asking me "Have I don't something wrong?". No, she hasn't. Not to me, but this train wreck is going to wreck someplace over there and not with me on it.
The other week I got a phone call from a crazy person once again. I'd distanced myself from her because of her never ending drama. About nine or ten years ago she married an Arab Muslim from Pakistan after they had known each other for about six weeks or so. He started to hit her and she left. While going through the process of their divorce, she moved back home here and then put up a profile on Match.com. While she had no money to pay her rent or buy groceries, she did seem to have enough to travel all across America to meet guys she had met online. She'd cried buckets of tears after one told her that after she'd spent a week with him in his hometown somewhere in California that he was not sure how he felt about the situation. Then he told her that it was over because he was in love with some woman he was sitting next to for an hour on an airplane. I couldn't believe that she was actually wasting time over this jackass but she asked me "Why doesn't he love me?". I didn't know what to say about it.
The drama continued when she relocated to pursue another degree, one resulted in her being thrown in jail. She said she was at some party with, once again, some guy, and they got into a fight. He threw a glass of wine in her face, and she stormed out. Just after she had stomped out of the party, the police picked her up and arrested her. For what? Drunk and disorderly, she explained. Were you drunk? No, she wasn't drunk, he had thrown the wine on her and they smelled the alcohol on her so they thought she was drunk. I didn't buy that. I don't care if the man has been a cop for twenty years or twenty minutes, they know drunk when they see it. After that story, I was hoping that she wouldn't bother to contact me again because I wasn't going to bother with this.
Sure enough, a few months ago, the phone rang and it was her. She had called my parents' house and my dad, like the oddly neive man he is despite his seventy years, gave her all my numbers and contact information. Hopefully she will never show up on my doorstep, but she has called several times since that initial contact. Now back in town, she failed to earn the degree she was after for some reason, and then she answered an ad for a roommate on Craig's List. She moved in, once again, with some guy, and was there for a day. Something went down, and she left the apartment, dropped everything and flew back here with nothing, leaving behind her job, connections, friends, etc. The guy who she lived with eventually sent back her clothes and things in boxes and doused them in chemicals, ruining them and all of her things. And now she really REALLY has nothing. She's not stable at all, according to her dad, her paranoia has mounted, and the next stop is the nuthouse if she doesn't get treatment.
I've decided that the best thing to do in this situation is to let things stand and not be part of it anymore. She needs someone to be her friend right now, but I'm not going to be that friend. Her life is going to be a continuous unfolding of toxic relationships and I don't want to be part of it because she is just a train wreck. Just because my life isn't a train wreck, she feels that she hasn't done her part because she hasn't made mine into one. I've turned my back on her. She called the other week, I hung up the phone, no explanation, no apologies, nothing. It's for the best. She wrote me an email asking me "Have I don't something wrong?". No, she hasn't. Not to me, but this train wreck is going to wreck someplace over there and not with me on it.
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