20 Years Ago Today
Today marks the 20th anniversary of the day that Kurt Cobain shot himself in the greenhouse of his Seattle home. My, much has happened since then. I was a snot nosed 90s hipster at the tender age of 19 when he died, I thought I knew everything. Part of that came from being in college radio and thinking I was much cooler than everyone else because I knew about some obscure band or other when no one else did. The me today laughs at that, but like everything else you didn't know until later how wrong you are.
It's hard to imagine that world anymore. This was the dawn of the Internet and yet we barely touched it. There was no social media, no text messaging, cell phones were the size of walkie talkies and were only found in cars or among the elite. Everything just kind of went silent that day, no one was around. This was, of course, my moment in youth culture as this was my era, The Grunge Years. Barely five years later I wouldn't be seen dead in those flannel shirts. I think I felt as if someone who was my friend had left, even though he and I never met of course. It was an exciting time when you felt that changes were in the air and he was the one who was going to usher in a new era of change. It did not happen. Instead we found out that he was a bigger mess than we thought he was and he was almost completely out of his mind, and rather trashy. We're in another place now twenty years later, to be sure. Gone is the sullen image of Seattle and replaced with Microsoft, Amazon and Starbucks. We're still sullen, but it's because we're suffering at the economic downturn and without much hope of business getting out of their paranoia and angst. Funny, it's how many years later and I have just as much middle aged angst as I did as a teenager which I didn't think I would have. But hey, life is strange.
I look at my peers in the rock and roll world today, we have all changed. We're fatter, we're poorer, we're shorn and our hair is turning grey. We found other things to do with our time, we found other means to show our creative sides. When we realized it wasn't about staying out until the wee hours and submerging ourselves in self destructive behaviors and alcohol abuse anymore, we stopped being so foolish. Some of us are parents ourselves now, some of us regret all those tattoos and piercings. Some bought houses in the suburbs, some got married, some got divorced, and some of us, sad to say, are dead. We're adults now. And yet, I'm sad on this day. I know that there is so much that many, Kurt included, never got to do and see. He never got to see his daughter grow up, he never got to achieve anything other than what he did, he never got to experience and change into who we all are today. Because you know what? Being an adult is actually pretty cool. Ha ha ha ...
Although I'm sure there are a lot of snarky comments that people will make about him in a variety of situations, I wanted to take out a few minutes to tell the world that he and Nirvana made a difference for me growing up. All of a sudden it seemed like there was a new sense of change in the air, a new social dynamic where the outcasts were suddenly cool. It was a magic time, one that really pissed off parents and made it all seem like it was brand new. Doubtful we will ever see it again on the level that we did. And as I move on towards the next phase of life, I will always look back on Nirvana and smile even though I'm an old geezer in the rock and roll world now. You were our Beatles. And it didn't happen again. Blue skies wherever you are, Kurt, I still miss you.
It's hard to imagine that world anymore. This was the dawn of the Internet and yet we barely touched it. There was no social media, no text messaging, cell phones were the size of walkie talkies and were only found in cars or among the elite. Everything just kind of went silent that day, no one was around. This was, of course, my moment in youth culture as this was my era, The Grunge Years. Barely five years later I wouldn't be seen dead in those flannel shirts. I think I felt as if someone who was my friend had left, even though he and I never met of course. It was an exciting time when you felt that changes were in the air and he was the one who was going to usher in a new era of change. It did not happen. Instead we found out that he was a bigger mess than we thought he was and he was almost completely out of his mind, and rather trashy. We're in another place now twenty years later, to be sure. Gone is the sullen image of Seattle and replaced with Microsoft, Amazon and Starbucks. We're still sullen, but it's because we're suffering at the economic downturn and without much hope of business getting out of their paranoia and angst. Funny, it's how many years later and I have just as much middle aged angst as I did as a teenager which I didn't think I would have. But hey, life is strange.
I look at my peers in the rock and roll world today, we have all changed. We're fatter, we're poorer, we're shorn and our hair is turning grey. We found other things to do with our time, we found other means to show our creative sides. When we realized it wasn't about staying out until the wee hours and submerging ourselves in self destructive behaviors and alcohol abuse anymore, we stopped being so foolish. Some of us are parents ourselves now, some of us regret all those tattoos and piercings. Some bought houses in the suburbs, some got married, some got divorced, and some of us, sad to say, are dead. We're adults now. And yet, I'm sad on this day. I know that there is so much that many, Kurt included, never got to do and see. He never got to see his daughter grow up, he never got to achieve anything other than what he did, he never got to experience and change into who we all are today. Because you know what? Being an adult is actually pretty cool. Ha ha ha ...
Although I'm sure there are a lot of snarky comments that people will make about him in a variety of situations, I wanted to take out a few minutes to tell the world that he and Nirvana made a difference for me growing up. All of a sudden it seemed like there was a new sense of change in the air, a new social dynamic where the outcasts were suddenly cool. It was a magic time, one that really pissed off parents and made it all seem like it was brand new. Doubtful we will ever see it again on the level that we did. And as I move on towards the next phase of life, I will always look back on Nirvana and smile even though I'm an old geezer in the rock and roll world now. You were our Beatles. And it didn't happen again. Blue skies wherever you are, Kurt, I still miss you.
Cool read down memory lane, thumbs up!!
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